So, out of nostalgia and maybe sadness, I bought one for myself and one for my sister, who was “at her job” during launch and unable to surf the net for Kim’s fine wares. Then I watched Kim and Mario Dedivanovic’s natural rapport in this video, and thought, F riendship used to be fun, too! Remember how this used to be fun? I thought. I suffered through 33 minutes of this Kim and PatrickStarrr video and thought about nihilism almost exclusively, until the very end, when I thought about Kim’s cheekbones. So, when Kim posted a video of her new contour sticks in action last month, it felt like seeing a high school acquaintance at a bar in the town I grew up in over Thanksgiving weekend, where the interaction is a little dreaded but there’s an undercurrent of smug glory in knowing I’ve changed and she hasn’t.Ĭontouring videos are mostly the same as they were in 2013. I watched makeup tutorials for pleasure before moving to New York, before Trump, before getting an MFA in freelance beauty writing. So why now, Kiki? Are you watching your throne? Do you feel like the person you once were has been voided, that you can’t access her anymore, that you’ll do anything to get her back, including reverting to your younger self? Also, last May, Kim said she was over officially over contouring or, at the very least, was wearing less makeup and looking for a simpler routine. Kylie capitalized on the art of the Instagram-promoted makeup line and is the star of her own E! show in the Keeping Up with the Kardashians slot now. Kim’s the queen of the internet and the queen of contouring, sure, but doesn’t it kind of seem like she’s hanging off the coattails of Kylie Jenner’s itty-bitty sweatshirt on this one? Seems literally so rude. The timing of Kim Kardashian’s contour kit seems off. Photo by Dominique Charriau/WireImage via Getty Images
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